His swaggering toddle bemuses me. I look at him and think, “shoot. I must have been like that too.”
It is hard to imagine myself as a little girl—many times I look at a picture of myself and I cannot find any emotional tie which affirms that the little person I am looking at is actually me. And here is Lucas, and it is hard to imagine that just one year ago he popped out, kersplat, healthy as can be minus one kidney.
I think one of the biggest gifts a child gives to an adult is the ability to reconnect with, dare I say, one’s inner child (oh, so new age-ish!). I look at the kid, and find myself suddenly trying to see the world through his eyes, through his sense of smell, through his touch, through his height; suddenly, my world seems new, different, exciting, beautiful. The old mundane becomes the new modified excitement of the day, and I copy his giggle just to see what it feels like again to giggle with no apparent reason except I can, he can, we can. I clap my hands, I toddle about, I fall over laughing, and his sparkling eyes follow me in wonder and his laugh affirms me in joy.
Without him to drag me down to his child level, I sincerely believe my life would be too adult-overwhelming right now. I can look at him and my heart melts; I can play with him and I can let go of the stress and forget; and I can hug him to get my quota of lovin’.
It’s his birthday, and it is hard to imagine his littlehood of twelve bygone months, already outgrown, toddling. Tomorrow, he’ll be in my shoes, in college, and I hope he can have a little one like himself to be blessed by and to remember to see the world differently, to see the world not with rose-colored glasses, but through a child’s eyes.
3 comments:
Yea. I remember seeing the world thru the boys eyes when they were tiny. It gave me an excuse to play on the floor, make a snowman in the yard. Seeing the world, as an adult, thru the eyes of a child is an awesome thing. It is one of the gifts that our parents give us.
Another time that was especially exciting for me to see the world thru my children's eyes was when they were teen agers. They were doing so many new things that they had never done before. I thought of it as being the "toddler years of adulthood". So many firsts, just like when they were tiny.
O Rachel,enjoy this time, cherish this time, savor this time. It will be gone so soon. I am so delighted that you have this blog for remembering. It will be so precious to you in the years to come.
Sorry for the long response but it triggered memories of my own.
Sir Lafalot
Auntie, I like your long responses! I am always fascinated by what people think, what they experience, and to hear you recount some of your own is positively affirming to me, and I'm sure to Rachel as well. Keep doing long responses! It makes us all happy to hear from other people. Love you!
Yes, seeing the world through a child's eyes lifted me up too. And, I miss it a lot. I miss all of you so much. Grandma Melody
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