Thursday, February 11, 2010

Thoughts and fears

I promised when I married Rick to go where he goes. That was a lot easier to promise than to put into action!
Rick spends 2 hours a day commuting to and from work. He HATES it!
When he first started working at Energy Solutions in Richland last June, we'd agreed to wait until he'd been at his present job for a year before trying to move.
He feels he's been very patient to put up with commuting this long. That patience is wearing dangerously thin.
Several things are holding us up in moving.

1. A big one for me being fear. Rick's lost his last 3 jobs for various reasons. I'm not ready to make a commitment to move when jobs can be so insecure. This one appears to be secure, but I suppose only time will tell.
2. Another reason to wait is that I'm 7 months pregnant and have a history of preterm labor. I've been told by midwives that it's very dangerous to move while pregnant as it can set off preterm labor. So moving is out for at least several more months.
3. Work. Too much work.
4. Living in the city. This one I detest. We'd like to live in the country and fairly close to his work. The problem being that we're not ready to double our house payment in order to do so.
It would be nice if life would just continue as it is. Not having to move would be wonderful.

Rick's solution to this problem is to purchase a duplex and live in half of it during the week, spending the weekends in Walla Walla at this house.
Theoretically this may work. As long as the other half of the duplex was consistently rented. This "should" cover the mortgage payments on the duplex. Then we'd still have our regular house payment to make on our Walla Walla place. It would be our weekend getaway place.
The practical side of me says, "TOO much work!" Double sets of food, dishes, furniture, clothes and diapers to be packed. Rick just waves these concerns aside. It would make more sense to me to simply sell our house in Walla Walla- as much as I'd hate to do so.
5. Then there is the financing options to be weighed. Refinance? Second mortgage? We don't have a 20% down payment just laying around. We'd have to transfer - is that possible?- the equity out of our house and into the duplex. Grrr! Life can be complicated.
6. If we were to sell our house, I'm overwhelmed with the idea of getting and keeping everything up to snuff for showing it. Rick thinks that we should start the whole process when Alyssa's here next month.
Sigh... I wish I could bury my head in the sand and wait for it to blow over. For it just to go all the way away! Why can't I just buck up and deal with it? It isn't as if we'd be moving across the country!
I've been praying. I don't have peace. Change is very hard for me. When we moved to Walla Walla 6 almost 7 years ago, I cried and cried. I HATED it! I know I'll adjust again. But there is such a good support network here.
Oh well, as my sister in-law would say, "suck it up princess!" In other words, DEAL WITH IT!

6 comments:

Laura said...

It is hard to deal with change. But you must do what's best for your family! Take care and don't stress too much. Focus on keeping that baby inside right now!!

Anonymous said...

Bippity, Boppity, BOOM!

Fairy godmother here.

Wait until after the baby comes, since we don't want an early birth.

In the meantime, house hunt to see what options are affordable and available.

Lastly, lots of hugs and love to you both.

XO
Jen

JeneƩ said...

That is a lot to think about but I think you should wait until number 3 is here! You don't need the stress of all this right now. Thoughts and prayers!

Anonymous said...

Big decisions Rachel. No wonder you are in a turmoil.
Given your history, I am with Laura, "Focus on keeping that baby inside right now."
House hunting may be a good idea too, as long as it is not too stressful.

In the mean time keep asking Him for peace, direction and agreement between you and Rick. HE is the best advisor and mind and heart changer. He knows best and will show you what direction to go and give you both the strength to do it.
Um, not that you asked anyone of us for our opinion. Only HE knows what is best.
Hang in there sweet girl. sl

Leilani said...

My grandparents always seemed to move within 6 weeks of a baby's birth (they had 5). I've asked my grandma about this, but she just waves it aside. I think she's suppressing. :)

Here's to a peaceful mind, a peaceful heart, and no packing!

Lisa said...

Oy. So much stress. I would hate to move at this point in my life, too. But I can sympathize with the work/commute thing, too. Colby works an hour and 20 min. away from here, but thankfully he can work 4 days a week and have Fridays off. They are long days 10-12 hrs. and we hardly see him at all during the week, but right now we're just thankful there IS work to be had. I keep telling him that if it were summer we could all go camp up there during the week, but it's not. It's winter. :P

I hope you are both able to find a good compromise that works well for your family. And are able to rest, rest, rest all you need to keep that baby put for now!!!